No wonder the Labour party favours red. It's the colour of their faces.
Milkybar has managed to enrage half a continent in less time than it takes to pass out the white chocolate treats. He really should have stuck to waving toy guns and grinning with teeth that have never been tainted with chocolate. The Gorgon has had to send out Count Mandelson to smooth things over, but that left the Gorgon running things here.
Which meant that Mrs. Bucket ended up insisting on TV that there was to be a free vote while the Gorgon was calling a three line whip. When he found out he wasn't allowed to whip opposition MPs, he called off the vote at the last minute. Then moaned that the opposition wouldn't do as he said. The clue is in the name, Gorgon.
Peter Hain was caught with his hand in the till and ordered to apologise. That's British justice these days; the more important you are, the lower the sentence.
MP Dawn Butler has a lovely little note signed by the Boss of America, Barack Obama, even though she can't spell his name. He wrote it on House of Commons notepaper. Which was nice.
As for all that 'thinking of the children'....
They'd better not believe Labour is going to get them into University.
The schools are run by Righteous who promote family and can't see a problem with that. All those new specialist schools do well because they suck funds from other schools, so it's no wonder children are turning to booze and drugs.
Labour: Tough on education, tough on the causes of education. What was that other slogan the Tiny Blur was so fond of? Oh yes, it was 'Crime, crime , crime'.
Knife crime is at an all-time low, if you look at the charts upside-down as the Ripper has been doing all along. A month ago she said 'Whoops, someone's leaked figures showing knife crime is down'. Now, school kids wear stab vests to school because knife crime is, in fact, up by 18 per cent. Better check you have those charts the right way up before leaking them accidentally in future, Ripper.
In Scotland, the SNP justice minister has been called on to resign because he missed a summit on knife crime. In Westmonster, the Home Economics Secretary will be allowed to mumble an apology and carry on with no regard to real life, as usual. (He won't resign. He's a politician. They have no honour and no shame.)
The UK's new growth industry, burglary, is showing above-inflation increases in productivity. The Ripper blames it on
So what is all this? A late summary of 2008? No, it's a selection of a few of the news stories over the last couple of days. Not even a week's worth, and there are far too many to put into a single post as it is.
Anyone presiding over a company that had two or more humiliating reports in the press in the same month would be forced out of office at once. The Brown Gorgon presides over a government that has dozens of humiliating reports every day. He and his drones insist all is well and if there is anything wrong, it's because there are still members of the public who haven't been arrested yet.
Gorgon, here's a suggestion, a line of wasted type because you've never listened to anyone and never will. Here it is anyway.
Try looking with the good eye for a while.